Restore and more for Twenty-Four

Restore and more for Twenty-Four

This is a word that I and others in my church have received for 2024.

The Lord has said He will ‘restore and more for ‘24’ and I am agreeing with that in faith – for myself, the church and for all of my loved ones.

For you too!

As I thought about this, looking forward, I was minded to also look back – because largely our actions and choices yesterday pave the way for our future.

One universal law is that of sowing and reaping – the seeds I sow today will bear fruit in the future, for good or for bad – each according to their kind, and with increase, of course.

Those who know me, know that I always write a public, monthly gratitude list for all of the acknowledged answered prayer during the previous month. Throughout the year, I have written out each of the specific answered prayers for each month.

But, as I wrote out my final lists of thanksgiving for November and December, I felt compelled to stand back in gratitude and survey the whole of 2023.

When we stand back, we sometimes see a more complete, bigger picture that looked incomplete from close up.

As I look at the year as a whole, I see the hand of God guiding the choices and paths I took during 2023, but also in the lives of those for whom I have been praying.

I really am blown away in gratitude to see how long-standing prayers for issues and situations are finally beginning to show good fruit. I see areas of real transformation becoming apparent over the course of the year.

This gives me great hope and excitement for this coming year too.

I will include here a few of the things that stood out as areas to rejoice over, to give all the glory to God, Who has proven that to honour and to trust Him is true wisdom.

I am so grateful for a year of emotional and spiritual healing, leading to real transformation in my heart, showing itself in good fruit in my life.

I am grateful and amazed at the successful merger of two churches who became one, and from which the Lord has birthed a new church.

I am grateful and fascinated how the Lord has brought me back home to the family home, has removed obstacles and has restored and healed many wounded areas.

I am grateful and excited about the growth in most other relationships and the opening up of opportunities for more transformation, the blessing of others, and for the Lord to be glorified.

I am so grateful to also see real answered prayer and blessings for other loved ones – physical and emotional healing and transformation, new homes, new jobs, breakthroughs, growth, restored hope, and so much more.

I am grateful because I can see the transformation that has happened in so many areas over the course of the year. It increases my faith and strengthens my courage to go forward as a blessing, not an apology.

I am excited!

I receive with faith that this year will see a continuation and escalation of good fruit and transformation in and amongst us, for the glory of God.

If He can do it in my life, don’t give up hope for yourself and those for whom you are praying.

The Lord can breathe life and resurrection into dry bones, if we invite Him.

May your 2024 ‘restore and more’ and may you receive all that your Heavenly Father longs to bless you with.

Autumn Thanksgiving 2023

Thanksgiving for answered prayer in September and October 2023

There is always so much to be grateful for!!!

These bi-monthly posts are specifically thanksgiving for answered prayers during the two previous months.

I pray about so many things and one day in February 2021, I heard in my heart – ‘Why do you not come back to say thank you when I answer your prayers?’

Luke 17:

15 One of them, when he saw he was healed, came back, praising God in a loud voice.

He threw himself at Jesus’ feet and thanked him—and he was a Samaritan.

Jesus asked, “Were not all ten cleansed? Where are the other nine?

Has no one returned to give praise to God except this foreigner?”

Then he said to him, “Rise and go; your faith has made you well.”

So this is what I do – publicly – to give all the praise and thanks to God, who is faithful and good.

As prayers are answered, I log them in my thanksgiving book.

So, for September I specifically give thanks:

For enabling me to successfully restore the garden furniture

For 2 extra work-days in lieu of days off for the course next month.

For grace to strengthen relationships at work

For finally a chance to clear and clean the dining room

That the children were happy to return to school

That Chatterbox’s first day back brought in old and new families and carers

That I finished reading and reviewing ‘Unashamed’ in time for my blog slot.

For S coming to our church and being blessed

That the boys all had a great camping trip together

That S and I had a relaxing Sunday and time to talk.

For L & A finding a good flat in the right location

That J arrived safely back in Vienna and has a place to stay

That the refunds were both successful

That the statement needed finally arrived in time

For a lovely, easy reunion at J & P’s

That M&D continue to open their home for our home-group and that we started back with joy

For safe delivery of D’s granddaughter

For the amazing gift of prayer ministry to break long-standing, deep bitter roots

For inspiration and time to sort the kids’ clothes

That S managed to finally commission the boiler and got home safely

For a fun charity concert evening with S and many from church

That R, S and D and family now come to church

For letting me pray for, and for you healing T’s toe.

For my new volunteer and all the old faithful ones

For allowing me to think your thoughts after you

For the gift of dreams and for speaking to me in them

For the new pound rail

For new directorship and energy in the shop

For sending me K to lend me the scanner to copy old negatives and inspiring me to buy my own

For a lovely day out with kids to see C’s art exhibition at the university

For courage to pray for healing for M

For the improvement in C’s condition

Blessed be God forever!!!

And thanksgiving for specific answer prayers in October:

For inspiration, time and energy to let me help Gs to downsize

For giving Gs a bungalow so quickly!

That S fixed the downstairs loo and commissioned the heating in time for visitors

That I now have heating in my room!

For ideas, time and energy to make improvements on house and garden, do some plastering and to prepare fuel for winter.

For inspiration to speak up and effect change

For increased footfall already in this first week!

That C came with me to the EH seminars and for working in us both

That sharing dreams has enabled honesty and communication with D and S

For directly answering my question about overtly Christian messages – Matt 11

That S and I had a positive and productive week together in London and I managed to complete all the goals I had set.

For inspiration in London to make nice things and to meet up with P in Hanwell

For the honour of being asked to consider leading small groups in January

For inspiration and resources to make a lovely birthday weekend and sleepover for C and the kids

For showing me how to give a mother’s blessing

For blessed days of rest

For healing S’s ankle

For speaking into S’s heart and shifting her focus to blessings and what she can do to improve her life.

Blessed be God forever!

Thank you so much for your continued inspiration, presence and constant faithfulness to all who seek you with a sincere heart.

enjoying a birthday celebration together

‘In ordinary life we hardly realise that we receive a great deal more than we give, and that it is only with gratitude that life becomes rich.’ – Dietrich Bonhoefer

Summer Thanksgiving and Update

I especially want to thank my loving God and Father for all of the specific answered prayers that I have noticed and noted down during July and August this year.

As always, I’m quite sure that there are hundreds of other daily divine interventions in answer to my prayers of guidance and protection for myself and for all of my loved ones!

In July I thank Him specifically:

• that our church building is now physically a ‘light on the hill’
• for the energy, leadership and life in the newly merged church
• that I was able to borrow ‘loppers’ to trim down the eucalyptus and 2 bay trees
• that I created a guest room space in time for guests arriving!
• That I unpacked most of everything and it feels like home
• that I have been a blessing already to S
• that P had a good visit here
• that Josh arrived here safely for the Summer break
• that S and J made good progress in B Road
• that preschool, although having to close, were able to celebrate at church for patrons of 36 years service in the community.
• For healing K’s eyes, strengthening her faith and blessing her heart and family
• for blessing our Youth, Ablaze and Little Sparks
• for all the memories reignited whilst sorting all my lifetime of photos!
• For all my chats and time with Josh and all his friends now appearing again at the house
• that S and D are living happily alongside one another again
• that I could coordinate and book a holiday for 5 of us to Orkney

And my thanks for specific answered prayer for August:

• that I’ve had time to clear the front garden and paths
• that I now have wall lights and shelves
• for speaking to me through ‘Unashamed’ book that I’m reviewing
• for the joy of reading Susan’s ‘Return to Caesarea’ book
• for the people You introduce me to at work and all the divine encounters there – especially D and E.
• for a lovely evening out at Kayal with J, C, J and V.
• for the August break from duties and extra time for family and garden
• for your favour, grace, protection and presence on the whole journey – trains and boats – to and from Orkney and our wonderful family holiday there.
• That I’ve been able to clear and ‘chip’ all the garden rubbish from the patio
• for the new storage solution for DVDs
• For the miracles You are doing in church, at home and in me!
• For this rich, blessed life of adventure, mercy and Your great LOVE
• For the HOPE you give to Your children

all of us together at the Stones of Stenness

And I thank the Holy Spirit that every time I come to write a blog, He gives me grace and words to write and always some reader is inspired.

I thank God for you, my readers too. ❤

Don’t forget to go and thank God for all of the prayers He has answered this week for you.

He is so faithful.

YAY! Special Thanksgiving (Long Overdue) and Life Update.

Sing to the LORD, praise his name; proclaim his salvation day after day. Declare his glory among the nations, his marvellous deeds among all peoples.

Psalm 96:2-3

I apologize for not proclaiming my monthly gratitude for answered prayer since April!

I have much to declare thanks for during May and June, but I have been exceptionally busy moving house. If anyone has recently had to move house, they will know how time-and-energy consuming it is! Most of it I lifted, cleaned, packed, carried and unpacked myself.

But here I am, now one week in the new place.

The previous home I give great thanks for. But that chapter has ended and a new chapter has begun.

I praise God in anticipation of all He will continue to do in my life in my new home.

But, during May and June, in answer to specific prayers, I want to give God glory and thanks for:

For an evening of healing, resurrection and re-instatement for my dear C.

For a time of prayer ministry for my own blocks to processing grief.

For excellent workmanship by the plasterer for my new palace.

For inspiration to submit all final EH homework in time.

For 2 beautiful grandchildren sleepovers over 2 May bank-holidays.

For inspiration for both Ablaze lessons on the risen Jesus (pre-Ascension) and Pentecost.

For a lunch treat with my dear R.

For some extra overtime in lieu of some holiday days off.

For some good walk and talk catch-ups with good old friends.

That C has faced looking at budgeting wisely.

That J and S did a great week’s work together in WD.

That S had a refreshing walking holiday.

That M and S had a second successful working week together in WD.

That P’s tumour was benign.

That J has ‘bounced back’ after being beaten up.

For a successful, bonding, church-family meal.

That K is looking well and loving her new home.

For healing K’s eyes!!

That C was awarded a research placement for the Summer.

For the 5^th excellent EH weekend and for healing and showing me glimpses of my true identity.

That M got his 2 books published!

That I got the ceiling painted and the fresh plaster sealed and EH homework all completed by 26^th May.

That ferrying T to airport and her visit was all a great blessing.

For energy and grace to keep going…

For all 5 amazing baptism testimonies and for R’s dedication – for a transformative day!

For chance to go to Cathedral to celebrate 35 years since becoming a Catholic.

That C got 95% for his last essay and has now completed his Year 2 exams.

That C prepared well for his talk and had a wonderful experience at the conference and then blessed the homeless from the overflow of conference food.

That J is on the mend and was well enough to pop in to see me.

That D was well enough to travel.

For all my amazing volunteers at the shop, for the new ones and the great teamwork.

That J now has a new SJD supervisor.

For the final EH 202 weekend and that we have all graduated.

That J had time to help with last bits of woodwork and I got all painted and sanded before carpet came.

For lovely meal and evening with C, J and N.

For a powerful youth-led service on Fathers’ Day.

That G and I finally had a more fruitful dialogue.

That I was able to help out J and C.

For D’s blessed time at mine and her help with my move.

For K’s help with moving and cleaning.

That the bigger items of furniture and white goods all found worthy homes in time.

That I managed to complete it all without scrimping and got keys handed in by 1pm on 30^th.

That S welcomed me into my new home!

This may seem like a long list of trivia, but god hears each and every prayer and He is greatly interested in the details of our lives.

He loves to bless us and to use us to be a blessing to others.

Praise His Holy name.

“Let the whole earth sing to the Lord!

Each day proclaim the good news that He saves

Publish his glorious deeds among the nations.

Tell everyone about the amazing things He does.

Great is the Lord! He is most worthy of praise!”

1 Chronicles 16: 23 – 25

my new home only 3 weeks before moving in.

Praise God I am now in my new home and a new chapter of my life!

Reaching 8 years! Out-reach.

16:55

I thought I would write something about the outreach/ missionary work being done in Romania. I spent a week out in Romania last week, visiting a friend who is working in Metro Ministries in a beautiful town of Sighisoara.

I spent a wonderful week in Vienna first, with my son, who is doing a doctorate out there, and then I took a long night train (13 hours) across Hungary to Sighisoara.

Me and Josh wandering Vienna…

one view of pretty Sighisoara

It was all such a privilege and adventure and I knew I was so blessed.

I felt like I had been away for two months, rather than two weeks, as the experiences were so rich!

The outreach in Sighisoara, within a very poor community, was very special indeed. The staff and team do such an amazing job with the families.

I was mainly taking part just in accompanying the beautiful little children to and from the Kindergarten in the Rhema centre. One day I had the pleasure of joining them in the Kindergarten too.

I loved the people and the country very much!

But today I realise that it is a week after my birthday. It is the 9^th of March, and that means that it is another milestone reached for me. On the 9^th March 2015, I had my last alcoholic drink.

I did not know if I would ever reach a whole month of sobriety and a year felt out of my reach completely.

It really was one-day-at-a-time!

It is for every addict.

But I reached the month goal. I reached 6 months and was rewarded with a little ‘chip’ medal.

Nine months was turbulent, but I reached a whole year, then 2 and now I have reached 8 years of sobriety.

It is due to the gift and the grace of God. It is thanks to the Power of Jesus. It is also thanks to the fellowship of AA, whose stories, acceptance, honesty, love and humility have taught me so many truths and taught me to see denial when it sought to confuse me.

I praise and thank God, AA, and my friends and family for loving me in my weakness and loving me into healing.

I thank them all for helping me to reach what I could never have attained by myself.

Stop.

An additional point to notice here is that the work of AA is also an extremely effective outreach work for the Kingdom of God!

Every Friday, I join an online Christian writing community, Five Minute Friday. We are given a one-word prompt and write – unscripted, unedited, pure free-write – for 5 minutes. The prompt this week is REACH.

Actually, I do read through my script afterwards to correct my mistakes, underlined in red; to check scripture references and to find an appropriate image to illustrate the topic.

Gifts are not just for Christmas.

Christmas and New Year Greetings

Christmas decor chez moi – nativity scenes, tree and lights

Gifts are not just for Christmas.

Some of my usual Christmas habits were neglected this year, though I’m not quite sure why. It is my wont to write and send dozens of Christmas cards to update far-away friends and family and then to text all my contacts a Christmas greeting and to post greetings up on Facebook and social media.

But, apart from a few cards abroad, I did none of that.

Of course, all of those that I would normally contact were in my heart and prayers as much as ever.

And you, those who share your hearts and thoughts with me in our blogging community, were also on my heart and in my prayers.

Even Christmas at home was less excessive and much more relaxed.

But for all that, I did have a really joyful Christmas – focusing on hospitality, family, giving time and love, and rejoicing.

I hope and pray that your Christmas was also full of the great JOY that the birth of Jesus means to those who know and love Him.

I do want to send you all the blessings of divine love, perfect peace and great joy, that the season of Christmas remind us of – though of course these gifts, just like the gift of Jesus, are not just for Christmas!

For you, for Christmas and for 2023, I want to bless you with a word from scripture, as a prayer of love over you all.

Ephesians 1:16-23

I do not cease to give thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers, that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and of revelation in the knowledge of him, having the eyes of your hearts enlightened, that you may know what is the hope to which he has called you, what are the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and what is the immeasurable greatness of his power toward us who believe, according to the working of his great might that he worked in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly places, far above all rule and authority and power and dominion, and above every name that is named, not only in this age but also in the one to come. And he put all things under his feet and gave him as head over all things to the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills all in all.

May we continue to stand strong in the gospel of peace and to stand for freedom and justice in this world. May we hear the voice of the Holy Spirit, reminding us of all that He has taught us, in Jesus’ name.

Bitter Fruits?

axe carefully laid to the offending root of bitterness

Take an Axe to the Root

Every Friday, I join an online Christian writing community, Five Minute Friday. We are given a one-word prompt and write – unscripted, unedited, pure free-write – for 5 minutes. The prompt this week is ‘ROOT’

I was excited to see this prompt-word last night, as I had just returned from a weekend of a prayer ministry course, which is focussed on eradicating ‘bitter fruit’ by identifying the ‘bitter root’ and laying an axe to that root.

The person seeking prayer ministry recognises some ‘bitter fruit’ in their life – issues that they wish were not there, aspects of behaviour that are problematic. These may be very obvious ‘bitter fruit’ like addictions and uncontrollable behaviour, or more subtle weaknesses which they may even consider to be ‘just the way I am’. It is something we want to change, but seem unable to change – it has become a ‘stronghold’.

The presence of the bitter fruit indicates the presence of the bitter root, whence it sprang, and the crux of the ministry is to lay the axe to the root, in repentance, and then bring all the habits of resultant behaviour to the cross.

The bitter roots are our sinful responses to the painful things that usually happen in our early life. The root is not the event or trauma itself, but my response to it. bitter roots (sinful responses) always cause ‘bitter fruit’ in our lives. God wants us to bring these to death on the cross.

The most common sinful response is to make judgments on the person we perceive to have caused our hurt (usually parents, siblings, family when we are so young). We also believe lies about ourself, the world or God, and we make vows to ‘always’ or ‘never’… in order to protect ourselves from further pain. In our young hearts, we create the expectancy that others will do this same thing.

This weekend I enjoyed the incredible (but slightly scary) power of this.

I wanted to receive this ministry to finally deal with some bitter fruit in my life.

One ‘fruit’ was never knowing what I need or want – decisions were treacherously difficult.

Another was being tired and resentful – sick and tired – of always striving to meet the needs of others to justify my existence. If you asked me why I said yes to everything, my answer would be ‘Why not? I see no reason why I shouldn’t. They need this and I have time.’

I didn’t think this was wrong. I thought it was good; that I was being a good girl.

I thought I was pleasing God by serving Him, because ‘inasmuch as you do this to the least of these, you do it for me.’

But I was feeling very tired, sometimes a little sad, sometimes resentful, lonely and weary. I was tired from constant striving to please, and striving to justify my existence, in order to deserve to breathe and live.

All my ‘service’ was coming out of duty. It was a sense of ‘I’ve got to do this today’, instead of ‘I get to do this today’.

In ministry I got to the roots – to judgments I made of my parents, lies I believed about myself and my worth, vows I made not to need or ask for anything. Therefore this is what I reaped all my life. True to my vow, I kept my needs and wants hidden from all, even myself. True to my judgments and expectations, my intimate experiences confirmed that my needs would not be met.

I felt exhilarated seeing this sure recipe for suffering as a direct result of my own responses to a child’s broken heart. I experienced the relief of repenting for my sinful judgments and responses, forgiving my parents, forgiving myself and God. I renounced my vow not to need or want and I confronted all of the lies with the truth.

Moving forward will not be quick and easy. The lies ran deep and no matter what my head told me, despite the word of God, my heart now needs to relearn how to operate and feel in truth.

I know that I cannot earn God’s love. I know that Jesus is my only justification. I know that Jesus forgives all the sins I bring to the cross. I know that He came to bring life to the full and that He is my provider and He gives us the deepest desires of our hearts. This is the truth and it is the truth that sets us free and brings joy.

I know this in my head, but it is not what my heart believed, nor was it the motivation behind my behaviour.

I came out of ministry feeling like my operating system had been wiped clean and all the functions need reprogramming.

But I am also so incredibly grateful and relieved, excited and full of joy.

I shall take it easy for a while. I want to learn what His will for me is.

I really don’t want to reach the end of my days saying ‘Phew! Are you happy, God?’ And to hear my heavenly Father reply, ‘Well, you were very busy, Dawn, but you didn’t do any of the wonderful things I had in mind for you. You missed out on freedom and joy and on your true calling.’

The word says in Ephesians –

For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus unto good works, which God hath before ordained that we should walk in them.

Ephesians 2:10.

I want to be vigilant to take contrary thoughts captive and watch for automatic patterns kicking back in, as I don’t want my healing to be snatched away by my own carelessness.

To be transformed by the renewing of my mind.

My first task is to meditate on this verse and spend some time allowing Father God to let me rest as a human-being and not as a human-doing.

Views and perspectives

FMF:View.

Every Friday, I join an online Christian writing community, Five Minute Friday.

We are given a one-word prompt and write – unscripted, unedited, pure free-write – for 5 minutes. The prompt this week is VIEW.

I’ve gone on a little holiday.

I took a train up to Ayr, to join my sister and her family for a week, staying in a couple of caravans right next to the beach.

This is Scotland and this week the weather is cool, with dramatic shifts of sunshine, showers, storms and sun-bursts again and again. The children love it despite the weather, as there are many activities to enjoy.

But the beach – that is what I love!

I took two of the children off to explore the coastline, believing there to be a castle somewhere nearby, but not knowing if we could reach it along the beach, or if it was in walking distance. But the children were game for the adventure.

Armed with sunglasses, raincoats and carrier bags for treasure, we set off towards the beach and our adventure…

It was slow going towards the first headland, because they decided to hunt and collect ‘sea-glass’.

As soon as I was drafted into the search, I got distracted by my own passion for pretty coloured stones… My focus moved from dancing under the wide expanse of sky, to scouring the sands and drifts for treasure.

Looking for treasure during the first part of the adventure. Reaching the first headland…

Finally we rounded the headland and whooped, as there in the distance, at the next headland, was the ‘castle’ we’d hoped to find. There were still several minor obstacles and a whole load of beached jelly-fish, but we reached the castle rock and imagined the possible stories told through the generations of history of 16th Century Greenan Castle.

Delighted to have our hoped-for destination in sight!

Pushing them to their limits, I persuaded them it was good to climb up to get a closer look, since we had come so far; brambles and nettles tried to deter us, reminiscent of the tale of ‘sleeping beauty’, but we reached the top and were immediately silenced by the beautiful views.

views looking back to the whole length of our journey from the far headland

The view made the destination more than worthwhile, though the adventure itself was such fun and a memorable afternoon out.

There’s more than one lesson in that!

The journey of life itself can be explored as an exciting adventure.

Push through to your destination, despite the obstacles and don’t give up.

The nearer you lean towards God’s heart, the closer you get to His perspective – and from heaven’s perspective, the view is amazingly all-encompassing and glorious.

I want to enjoy all of my life’s adventure from a heavenly perspective. Do you?

Life update

The theme I keep returning to for this week’s blog is to give you all an update on my life – or more accurately – on the progress of one of my current projects. Part of the healing work going on in me, is to recognise that, just as I am very interested in the actual lives behind all you wonderful bloggers and readers of mine, so also might you be interested not just in the random thoughts I scribble down from week to week, but you may also like to know something about me. If I am wrong, you can ignore this blog.

Since January of this year, 2021, I have been writing a book about the strategies and processing tools I found helpful in the task of finding the voice of my wounded inner child. The first section of the book explains why and how I did it and the impact it had. The second section contains excerpts from the writing during the main strategies I used to hear the silent inner child. I called my wounded inner child Suzie. The strategies I used have given Suzie a voice to express her long-buried trauma and her dreams, disappointments and emotions. It has not been an easy journey, but it has been necessary and hugely transformative. My dream was to share those strategies and processing tools to help others to deal with trauma, with hidden issues, and to come to a place of acceptance. Having heard my hidden child’s voice, I have been able to bring her pain and fear to the Lord, for healing. Confessing one’s emotions, one’s story to oneself is powerful! Confessing it to another safe person and receiving acceptance and validation – being really heard – is powerful and healing. Pouring out one’s heart and confessing to God, is powerful, transformative and brings wholeness. It is still transformative for me – it is a journey I am still on and there is more work to do. It is a healing of relationship – me with Suzie, with memories, as well as me with God and with others.

Section Two contains some of Suzie’s story, but Section One explains the why and how of it. This first section I have written, rewritten and rewritten again. I have written it in my own level of understanding of what the process has meant to me. Now I am holding my breath as it is being read by four people. One is a very close friend who is a psychotherapist and who will be writing a Foreword for my book, to explain my processing in the language of a therapist. My youngest son is reading it, with a view to illustrating some aspects of the story. Two friends are also reading it to provide me with some more general feedback, before I do the final edit and look for a publisher.

This is little me, an image of the hidden Suzie.

Obviously I am continually consulting God about these next steps towards publishing, as the whole process and all of it belongs to Him. He asks us to comfort and bless others with the comfort and blessing we receive from Him. This is the aim of the book – to share the great blessings and healing I have received. He is the Author and finisher of my faith; He is my healer; He is my wisdom and understanding; He knew me when I was hidden, mute and hurting and He was with me. He knows every thought before I do and He knows when I lie down and when I rise… and do you know, He cares! He knows my story, my thoughts and my deeds, and He still loves me and cares for me, as His own precious daughter.

You are the other child He knows and loves so deeply.